Being a boy mom has sort of become a huge part of who I am.
I was such a girly girl growing up — I had a lavender room, I wore dresses everyday, and for as long as I can remember I wanted to be a mom and a cheerleader when I grew up (I know, feminists everywhere just threw up on their floors). But now, the boyness I live each day has become such a big part of who I actually am.
I know, boyness is a gender thing and all of that, but I am here to tell you that my sons subscribe to the “boy life” fully. And while girls can for sure be all of the smelly, noisy, rambunctious, farty things that my sons are, I don’t have one here with me every day to prove it.
I have three awesome sons and as much as my loins used to ache to have a lady baby, I’m kinda over it now. In fact, at times (like the ones below) I’m downright glad!
- When it was time to go pee at the park and I didn’t have to worry about toilet papering the port-a-potty.
- Or even going in it, really. The woods behind it work perfectly fine, too.
- When we went to Disney and no one cared if we had dinner at the Be Our Guest restaurant.
- And we didn’t have to wait in line to meet any of the princesses. (Although we did wait to see Ariel from The Little Mermaid, but no one was totally put out about it.)
- We were fine just seeing the regular version of Frozen and no one cared if we didn’t get tickets to the sing-a-long one.
- Just like we weren’t put out when all of the Elsa Halloween costumes were sold out in every surrounding county and online.
- When we went to the baseball stadium and I didn’t have to get up a bazillion times to take anyone to the bathroom, because that’s Daddy’s job.
- When I didn’t need to worry about whether it’s appropriate for my 12-year-old to wear a two-piece swimsuit or not.
- And when we went back-to-school shopping, the only thing I had to worry about was whether or not the graphic on his graphic tee was appropriate.
- When I saw how much my friend spent on clothing for her middle school daughter last year.
- And when I heard them arguing over whether she really needed the purse AND a necklace to match her outfit.
- When I went to the store and just came home with some shorts for my son, and he said thanks, ripped the tag off and put them on.
- When I didn’t have to go into detail on the whole “monthly visitor” thing.
- When puberty hit and we didn’t immediately start talking about buying bras.
- When Kylie Jenner became a thing.
- When someone was mean to me and my 3 year old said, “If he says something else mean to you, Mommy, I’m gonna punch him in the stomach,” and meant it.
- When I found out how much American Girl dolls cost.
- When no one cared that I didn’t get to wash his uniform before the game. And, in fact, when I mentioned it, he balked because it would be bad luck.
- When he scored a touchdown and looked into the stands to make sure I saw him.
- And when he didn’t even act embarrassed because I was crying for real baby tears while screaming my voice away on the sidelines.